THE RULES - If You Wouldn`t Eat Soup Out Of Her Ass Then You`re Not A Fan Of Soup - University Comedy

We often hear, steal, or sometimes create worthwhile quotes.  These are just some that we can remember:

"The Rules" Member Quotes 

"I could text the pants off a Nun" - sandpaper

"Bite the pillow, I'm comin' in dry!" - Mutt

"Do you want to do it normal......or in the vagina." - Mutt

"Do you want to go on a titty walk" - Butterknife

"Don't piss on my head and tell me it's raining." - Mutt

"Going to the movies with your ex is like throwing gas on a smoldering fire" - sandpaper

"The key to any successful relationship is to do the complete opposite of what I say or do" - sandpaper

"The sex? Oh it was terrible. It was like masterbating with her vagina" - sandpaper

"It was like fucking a rock, she didn't move!" - sandpaper

"I get extra points for fucking a mute" - sandpaper

"You know how I know your gay? Your dick smells like ass" - Sandpaper

"Don't be picky...remember everyone looks the same with the lights off" - Mutt

Miscellaneous Quotes

"I would suck a fart out of her ass and hold it like a bong hit" - Dan Fogler

 "If I had a vagina, I would fuck Tom Cruise."

"Get up in dem guts"

"Get up in dem brains!"

"I wouldn't fuck her with your dick."

"Take her easy and if she's easy take her twice."  

"Take her easy and if she's easy giver her to [insert friends name here]." 

"At least I'm better looking than [insert friends name here]."

"I get more ass than a toilet seat"

"Nice Shitter"

"She's so wholesome. I mean. She probably shits cupcakes"

"Two in the pink, one in the stink"

"If there's grass...play ball."

"If she's old enough to crawl, she's in the right position."